Is it a full moon?

I swear I need to write a book. If me and all the other 911 dispatchers of the world got our warped minds together, we would be dangerous.

Here are some of our most recent dandy callers.

(Scene: It's 2:30 a.m. It's dark outside.)
911: Where is your emergency?
Caller: There's a bright light flashing in the sky, up above the mountain. I've lived here 29 years and I've never seen anything like this before.


*Apparently, the caller has never seen a plane in the night sky in all of his 29 years.

______________

911: Where is your emergency?
Caller: I've been robbed right here.
911: Where were you robbed?
Caller: Right here.
911: Where are you?
Caller: Right here.
911: ::headdesk::
911: What's your address?
Caller: I don't know.

(This is the point where my brain usually explodes. Eventually, this grown man figured out that alcohol and showing off his money to drug dealing friends does not mix.)

______________

Caller: I would like to talk to the officer who I talked to earlier today.
911: Which officer was it?
Caller: I don't know. He was wearing a uniform. He had short hair, about 5'8 and a pot belly.
911: (thinking ... ) Ma'am, I hate to say this, but that's what they all look like.
Caller: He was driving a black car.
911: (laughing) You're not helping me.
Caller: He wasn't very good looking.
911: Now we're getting somewhere.
Caller: He had a dip in his mouth.
911: I know exactly who you are talking about.

_____________


TTC News: Our beach trip is going to coincide with FW and O should be right around the time we come back. We're going to continue with Femara 5 mg this cycle but no IUI. We're just going to sex it up and take a mental break from treatment. I will get my midcycle scan before we leave. I'm actually kinda glad for a little break -- from work, life and medical intervention.